


Oil and Water and Hemp

by ThatwasJustaDream



Series: Caught in a Net [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010), Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Snark, sardonic Sherlock, wound up Danny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-11
Updated: 2014-02-11
Packaged: 2018-01-12 00:41:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1179870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatwasJustaDream/pseuds/ThatwasJustaDream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They weren't even compatible on their own four feet - and now they're ass over teakettle and caught in a net.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oil and Water and Hemp

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Crossover Fic month on 1_million_words comm on LJ. I decided to combine my own crossover month fics with a trope prompt - 'caught in a net'. Here goes...

"Perhaps you have a hearing deficit?" the man pinned with his back to him intoned it softly, almost gleefully, as if the idea were genuine and had just struck him. 

Really, they were more back to side, with the other guy's gangling limbs below, above and all around Danny. 

Each of them was trying to avoid any more contact with the other than necessary - which is a nice trick if you can pull it off while awkwardly cinched together in a net in a jungle, dangling from the treetops.

"That would be the logical assumption: You simply never heard me when I shouted 'Stop!'"

"Not helping...." Danny twisted and strained, fighting to push the thick, hemp fibers around enough to be able to maneuver his hand into his pocket - and onto his phone. "You are not helping at all, smart ass!"

"Do you have a HEARING DEFICIT?" Sherlock asked it loudly; sarcastically with a touch of sardonic thrown in for chuckles. "Is it as SIMPLE as THAT Detective WILLIAMS?"

"I do not. I'll tell you what, though; you're gonna have a consciousness deficit if you don't....."

"Or a brain disease? Something that causes you ... no, _compels_ you to do the exact opposite of whatever you're emphatically told you should do?" 

Sherlock was twisting, now, too, the tight note in his voice suggesting Danny's efforts to bring to the phone to his face to make a call were causing him unfortunate degrees of discomfort and that maybe Danny was enjoying it.

"A virus? Also a possibility. Or a ...jungle parasite of some kind....."

"Steve, can you hear me? Yeah-- hey, be a pal and get Chin to pinpoint my location via the GPS in this thing, would you?"

"Any of those: Parasite, virus, bacteria even... might make an otherwise sane man completely ignore a fellow detective's shouts of 'Stop, don't touch that! It's a trap!"

"Got it? Great. Now would the two of you get someone the HELL here to cut us down? We're caught in a damn NET, fifty freaking FEET in the air in the blazing sun, that's what I mean. Yes. A net. How the hell should I know WHOS net? Are you envisioning them standing on the ground below us explaining themselves? Because I assure you... they're not."

"Oh, my, that _is_ telling....." Sherlock purred as Danny slowly turned red from shouting. "Do all your friends laugh that loudly when you tell them you're trapped and in mortal peril?"

"I will PAY you," Danny started thrashing, the net dancing and Sherlock swearing epithets under his breath. "I will literally PAY you to stop talking..."

The laughter from the other end of the phone only got louder.

"Steven? Why are you not on your way? Okay....good. And send an ambulance. No, no... I'm okay. Just saying - send one, 'cause by the time you get here? I'm gonna wanna kill him."


End file.
